This month's guest blog is by Karen Ellis.
"fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10 ESV
Another night was spent begging God to protect my son and bring him home safely. This is getting old, I thought to myself. Why is this happening? I tried to teach them about the dangers of alcohol and drugs. My children know how it
affects everyone when someone you love is addicted. Where did I go wrong? I should have done more but it’s too late now, they are almost grown.
Have you had these thoughts? Sometimes we get caught in the hampster wheel of thoughts that just won’t stop. Our minds and hearts are filled with questions, fear, and anxiety that steal our peace and joy. Before we know it, we are questioning if God loves us and our children. Does He even hear our prayers? If He does, why isn’t He doing something?
My friend, I have been there. I know that feeling of a weight on your chest that won’t go away. But I have also found peace that passes understanding and joy in my circumstances when it doesn’t make sense. You can have that too.
Our not-so-secret weapon.
Before we can join in the battle for our children we must understand who our real enemy is.
"Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.” Ephesians 6:10-12 NLT
A few things to notice here:
● We are not strong enough to fight this battle alone nor are we meant to. We are to be strong in God’s mighty power. This is because God is stronger and mightier than our enemy.
● God gave us His armor to protect us and help us stand up against the “strategies” of the enemy. Did you catch that? Our enemy has more than one plan to defeat us and our children.
● Our children and the people who helped them become addicted to drugs or alcohol are not our enemies. I know it feels like it some days. But our real enemies are the “evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in the dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.”
Ok, now we know we are not alone and who the enemy is. This is important because it helps us focus our thoughts, attention, and prayers. As moms battling guilt, fear, and anxiety over our children, we need to be able to focus. Every woman knows we need the right outfit for the right occasion. Our Father has provided just the right wardrobe!
What is the Armor of God?
Ephesians 6:10-18 describes the Armor of God, equipping us to stand against the enemy’s schemes. Each piece of armor is a spiritual weapon that helps us resist lies, stand in truth, and pray effectively for our family.
1. Belt of Truth: I reject the lies of the enemy and stand on God’s truth.
2. Breastplate of Righteousness: I remember my identity is in Christ, not in past mistakes. His grace and mercy cover my past.
3. Shoes of the Gospel of Peace: I walk in God’s peace, knowing He is in control. God is God and we are not. He is still on His throne and has not given up control.
4. Shield of Faith: I trust God’s promises even when circumstances seem hopeless. Think of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, Daniel, Paul and Silas in prison, Hannah, Ruth, or Ester. There are so many stories in the Bible about people who faced seemingly impossible situations.
5. Helmet of Salvation: I take captive every thought and renew my mind in Christ. Oh, how the enemy loves to use our thoughts as his playground. He brings up past mistakes and painful memories to keep us trapped in the loop of shame and regret. Read your Bible daily and ask God to take control of your thoughts and remind you of His word.
6. Sword of the Spirit: When Jesus was being tempted by the devil he didn’t yell or give a speech. Jesus simply spoke scripture to rebuke the devil. We can do this too.
7. Prayer: I speak and pray God’s Word over my family. Some of the most effective prayers I’ve prayed are from using scriptures. I tell you from experience, the more I read my Bible, the more the Holy Spirit brings those scriptures to my mind when I am praying for loved ones.
Engaging in Battle: How I Pray the Armor of God Over My Family
Prayer is our greatest offensive weapon. Here’s how I pray each piece of armor over myself, my children, and future generations:
● Belt of Truth – Lord, I reject the enemy’s lies that I have failed. I declare that You are (insert child’s name here) Redeemer, and Your truth will prevail in (child’s name) life.
● Breastplate of Righteousness – God, protect my heart from guilt and shame. I surrender my past mistakes to You and believe You have forgiven me. I believe and trust you are working all things together for my good, (insert child’s name) good, and your glory. I trust that You are covering (insert child’s name) with Your righteousness.
● Shoes of Peace – Father, I choose to walk in Your peace today. Thank you for filling my heart with Your peace that passes understanding. Help (insert child’s name) find the peace that only comes from knowing You.
● Shield of Faith – I trust You, Lord, even when I don’t see change. Please strengthen my faith and (insert child’s name) faith in Your power to restore. I know nothing is too hard for you and your hand is not too short to save.
● Helmet of Salvation – Renew my mind, God. Help (insert child’s name) see Your truth and break free from the enemy’s grip. Please help us to keep our thoughts and our hearts focused on the truth of Your Word.
● Sword of the Spirit – I declare Your Word over my family: No weapon formed against us will prosper (Isaiah 54:17). (Insert child’s name) belongs to You.
Understanding the Enemy and His Tactics
Once we understand that our strength comes from God, who our enemy is, we need to be aware of his strategies. Some of these are:
● Accusation: The enemy likes to accuse us of our past mistakes making us feel hopeless.
● Deception: The enemy tries to deceive us into believing his lies that nothing will ever change, it’s too late, and there is nothing we can do.
● Discouragement: The enemy loves to discourage us so we will give up. He wants us to quit praying, quit believing, quit trusting God’s promises, and even better if he can get us to quit God altogether.
● Distraction: The enemy tries to distract us with people, things, and situations to take our eyes off what he is doing. If he can keep us distracted with other things and people we won’t be effective in stopping his plans for our children.
● Disunity: The enemy loves to create disunity and division in our churches, in our homes, and families.
● Fear: The enemy uses fear like a Jedi uses a lightsaber. He flings that stuff around every chance he gets.
● Illnesses: The enemy may use illnesses to distract us.
● Intimidation: The enemy will use intimidation to try and control us and our children. He tries to get us to believe God doesn’t love us, our sins are too much to be forgiven, or we aren’t good enough or a strong enough Christian to be fighting him.
I’m sure you have experienced at least one of these and can probably think of more. I encourage you to do just that. Make a list so you know how to fight. Our children’s souls and lives are too important to give up.
Jesus tells us in John 10:10 (NLT), “The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.” We want our children to have rich and satisfying lives in Christ.
Don’t give up momma!
“We are human, but we don’t wage war as humans do. We use God’s mighty weapons, not worldly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning and to destroy false arguments. We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 NLT
About the Author: Karen Ellis graduated from Union University, where I studied Religion and Social Work. Later, she earned a Master’s degree in Christian Counseling from Regent University. With over 30 years of experience in Social Work, active involvement in ministry through school and her local church, and membership in the Compel Writers Training program, Karen is here to offer you not just words but genuine encouragement and support as you trust God's unique plan for your life. Find Karen on her Warrior Women Blog and on social media.
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From Guilt to Grace: Hope and Healing for Christian Moms of Addicted Children by Dawn R. Ward, published on September 17, 2024 is available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.
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